Polarity
Misunderstandings, Disputes, Fights, Rivalries, Imposed values, Social Constructs… Once we realize cunningness of this concept, it becomes the most important experience we embrace. It is a bit of a ‘Mind Breaker’, it does make our Psych goes ‘Nuts’, and it might feel like ‘Loosing Ourselves’'
When I began walking this path, memories started surfacing—always at the perfect time, aligned with the lessons I was ready to learn. This happened almost like a rule: whenever I was near certain people, the lesson I needed to learn was tied to the core characteristic of that person (that was our initial agreement, to show me my weakness). Engaging with them wasn’t necessary; simply being in their proximity and exchanging benevolent energy was enough.
Back then, as now, topics were few but carried clear messages pointing to the same truth: the pointlessness of division. Politics, sports, cooking recipes, parenting styles—while seemingly different, they all share the same roots. These roots lie in the environment we grew up in—our household, social surroundings, education, and interests.
As children, we absorb patterns effortlessly. Seeing our parents as all-powerful, we internalize their emotional responses, behaviors, and interactions like dry sponges. These energetic patterns settle deep in our unconscious, only to be activated later in life. If we remain stagnant and avoid expanding our consciousness, we’ll likely continue living out these patterns without even realizing it.
We adopt these patterns from our environment, believing they are part of our core being. When someone challenges these beliefs, we defend them as if our lives depend on it. How often have you seen relationships fracture over differing political views or arguments about football tactics?
Real conflict arises when that pressure in the stomach builds, the hair on the back of your neck stands up, and you slip into defensive mode. Your stance hardens, your words grow harsher, and emotions flare. Your unconscious whispers that your world is crumbling. Your heart races, voices rise, body language becomes tense, and eventually, one word or gesture pushes things past the point of no return.
And why? Because I like red, and you prefer blue? Because I think my mom’s apple pie is the best, and you disagree? Because we debate whether a baby should wear a cap? Yet, despite these differences, we all grow into functioning adults with lives of our own.
The greatest accomplishment is rising above this silliness we call polarity. Accepting that we are all different and can coexist peacefully as long as we respect one another’s choices. Recognizing the importance of polarity opens doors to experiences you never imagined. It allows you to see that people often react unconsciously, giving you the power to observe deeply and connect with yourself. You begin to search for the same patterns within, cultivating calmness, emotional awareness, and clarity. Over time, you see situations and people for what they truly are—layers of illusion protecting their inner worlds.
These layers are subtle, invisible until you approach them with love and understanding. When you shed light on their origins, you can accept them and dive into their roots. The key is to remain centered, free from emotional disturbances, to perceive the truth. It’s challenging work—admitting painful truths, dismantling lifelong illusions, and realizing it’s all about growth and learning.
One of polarity’s greatest gifts is revealing our triggers. Whenever you feel emotionally charged—whether the situation involves you directly or you’re merely observing—that’s your trigger speaking. It’s a call from within, asking to be acknowledged. Like a child, it doesn’t know how to express itself gracefully, so it cries, screams, or acts out, demanding attention.
And there it is—the younger version of you, sitting alone in a room full of people, absorbing everything. That small sponge doesn’t know whether what it’s soaking up will serve its future or not. It simply takes in the world as it’s presented.
It all comes down to the younger you, who perceived information in a certain way and carried it forward as truth. A child doesn’t know better, but we, as adults, have the responsibility to recognize these misperceptions and transform them.
The blessings of polarity are few but profound. Without it, our learning would be much slower. Polarity allows us to compare, contrast, and grow through immediate realization. The other blessing is self-control. If you’re triggered by the same pattern repeatedly and can’t redirect or calm it, you haven’t fully learned the lesson. You’ll need to revisit it.
At first, it hurts. Your body aches, your known world crumbles, emotions rage, and your psyche feels overwhelmed. But as you commit to this work, embracing triggers as teachers, results emerge. You gain self-control, deeper understanding, emotional intelligence, and wisdom. In simpler terms, your friends and family might call you the “distant, awake eye in the corner.”
Be well, Stay centered
Yours truly,
Marko
